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Watch out.  I can get in a car now.  Hopefully my parents’ SUV, too, if I can manage the move from a curb.

RIC day 22 - Wheelies and Other fun stuff -

Crazy long day.  I’m beat.  I feel like I say that every night.

7:30am - Get woken up so they can take my blood for testing.  What a wonderful way to wake up!

9-10am - OT session with Ann Marie.  I was feeling rough but this was fun.  I practiced transferring to the mat, then pulling my feet up, then pulling into the groin stretch position (getting myself there this time).  Once I was there she set up little wooden blocks around the common area.  She then gave me a bunch of bags (kind of like in the game bags/cornhole) for me to throw at them from my groin stretch position and try to knock them all down.  It was fairly easy so then she placed them pretty far away.  It took me forever and I continued well after she suggested we move on to something else.  I hit a computer a few times, got one bag stuck up on a ceiling lamp, and hit a male nurse.  But I got them all down.

10-11am - Recreational therapy with Mike.  Tony joined, as well.  We practiced putting and I got into the altered golf cart that basically straps me in so I can play golf from a swivel seat kind of setup.  Hard to explain.  It was pretty fun.  Especially driving the cart around as I hadn’t driven anything since the accident.  I also met the golf instructor who also coaches the sled hockey team sponsored by the Blackhawks.  I might have to try that.  And we might go play an actual round of golf in a couple weeks.  Definitely encouraging to try and reassimilate to life.  

11am-noon - Lokomat.  Feeling better and better.  My mom does this strange-looking workout next to me where she walks in place and dances to whatever we are playing on Pandora.  Pretty hilarious.  I wish I had a video.  

1-2pm - LIFE Center education.  It’s basically a resource center for everything you can think of for disabilities.  Once again with Tony.  They seem to be pairing us up.  

2-3pm - PT with Jon (I think that’s his name).  We did a lot and still had 10 minutes to spare.  Climbing to a mat from the floor, doing wheelies and moving forward for 60 feet at a time, going outside and practicing going up and down a residential ramp.  That last bit was near impossible since my brace keeps me from leaning forward.  Any uphill movement and I’m flipping backwards.  Still fun, though.

3pm - X-rays.  Painful but hopefully we’ll find out if things are healing or if the gear inside of me has any screws loose or something.

3:30pm - Get the heck in bed and rest, do some emails, etc.

5-6:15pm - Psych session with Dr. Sweet.  More progress mentally.  She is super smart.

6:15pm - Head out with parents to Elephant and Castle for dinner, drinks, and the Blackhawks playoff watch.  Erik joined.  I only made it til overtime started and then I had to head back, only to discover that the game was not on my room’s tv.  They won, though, so that’s good.

See my next post for a video that may or may not amuse you.

Praise God.  Incidental lesson (not sure what brought it on.. maybe a card): I have often wondered if God was trying to humble me through the accident.  Or if He was trying to teach me a lesson - like I was having too much pride or something.  While it is definitely possible that He could be using it to mold me or something like that, I constantly need to remind myself that the God we believe in as Christians does not punish.  

So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.  - Romans 8:1

Gnight!
Chip

RIC day 21 - Mom's Bday

3 weeks here.  Hurray.

Countdown to taking off the brace: 58 days

Countdown to Rebecca moving to Chicago: 6 days

9-10am - OT with Jessica.  Weightlifting and hand bike.

11am-noon - Group therapy.  Wheelchair aerobics, basically.

12:30-1:30pm - OT with Uzma (sp?).  We did a car transfer and then practiced getting in and out of a real bed, since that’s what I’ll need to do when I leave.  I also managed to take off my brace and put it back on without assistance.  By the end of this I was worn out.

2pm - My aunt Cha and uncle Lee come out of nowhere.  The had driven up from Louisville this morning to surprise us, including my parents.  It worked!  

3-10pm - I rested for a bit, showered early, then we all went to Joe’s Steak and Crab House at Rush and Grand for my mom’s bday.  It was really great.  I’ll try and upload some pics once I get them.  My mom had a great time, I believe.  Plus the weather was great so we walked/wheeled it to and from RIC.  Really awesome.  I also tried the trick of putting a nicer shirt over my harness so it wasn’t screaming that I am helpless.  I think it worked. 

I am now toast.  

G’night,

Chip 

RIC day 20 - Brunch Oblivion

Countdown to taking off the brace: 59 days

Countdown to Rebecca coming to Chicago: 7 days

I forgot yet another really cool gift from yesterday.  While I wasn’t there for it, knowing it was done is almost as cool.  See below.  

If you can’t read it, they had the Cubs marquee say “GET WELL CHIP!” and sent me a photo of it.  Pretty cool!!! 

Today went pretty well.  I got to sleep in, which isn’t as great as it sounds. The longer I lay in bed, the worse my back feels.  So I got up around 9:30 and sat in my chair staring out the window for a while.  At 10:30 my parents showed up and we went to the building chapel for service.  We even got Tony (another patient) to join us.  Super small crowd - 6 in the “congregation”.  But it was a good message on Psalms.

After that I went back for a quick cath then back out to try out West Egg Cafe.  Very good, and nice about the wheelchair, too.  I had a bacon, spinach, egg and cheese frittata.  Really good.  My parents split some whole wheat walnut pancakes.  Ben and Sam showed up halfway through to say hi.  They were headed to some class about how to have a baby.  I’m sure it was fun for them.

1pm - Lokomat training.  Better and better on that thing.  This time got up to 60% of my body weight on the feet and moving faster, too.  35 minutes. Also Tony watched as we’re (by we I mean me and the therapists) trying to talk him into using it.  

2:45pm - Pool therapy.  Once again good, but I was tired.

4-5pm - nap

5:30 - Go through the painful process of dressing myself and getting into my wheelchair with as little help as possible.  It wore me out but I guess I should practice that.  Parents then left to go see Million Dollar Quartet, which they loved.  

6pm - Erik showed up with Thai takeout.  Awesome.  Then we headed to Navy Pier to watch Oblivion on IMAX.  It was actually really good.  Action/sci-fi, weird plot twists… all in all pretty good.  Navigating the wheelchair to and from Navy Pier was almost as fun as watching the movie.

Here is something in my room that’s been up since the surgery.  Rebecca and Leah made it.  It’s a prayer map, showing everywhere in the world that people are praying to God for some resolution in my situation.  Looking at it is always humbling.  If you know of a place, let me know!  Antarctica?  We’d have all 7 continents if we had that.  Just sayin…

It also gets a lot of attention from the staff here, including last night when the PCT (tech) walked in on me on the pot in the bathroom (also naked since the shower was right after that) and… well…

Tech: Hello (opens door without knocking… there are no locks on the bathroom doors here for safety)

Chip: Kind of busy in here!

Tech: Yeah I just had a question about the map you have.  Are those places you’ve been?

Chip: No, it’s a prayer map.  Each star represents someone praying in that country.  Please… some privacy?

Tech: (in no hurry) Oh okay.  Yeah I see you’re busy.  Well that’s cool.  I was hoping it was where you’ve been.  I want to go to all 50 states and you have a lot there.

Chip: (getting mad and not talking)

Tech: Right… okay I’ll leave you alone.  You know how to reach me!

Chip: Yep.  Bye.

I hope you found that as funny as I found annoying :)

Gnight!
Chip

RIC day 19 - Picnic with Friends

Today was really a great day.  

First, I slept well.  The Ambien is working well. 

9-11am - Headed down to Navy Pier with 2 other patients and 3 therapists - Kelly, Jessica, and Mike.  We went to Billy Goat Tavern to have breakfast on RIC.  The food was okay but the trip was awesome.  The weather was great, I got to have a little fun doing wheelies over obstacles (a new and useful trick Mike taught me) like hoses, uneven cracks in the sidewalk, etc.  We had a great time.

11am - Worked out a bit on the bike, then jumped into the group therapy which wasn’t on my schedule for some arm workouts.

Noon - rested a bit.

1pm-4pm - Headed to the track a block north with my parents where my friends were setting up a picnic-style brunch.  What they didn’t tell me was that they had a whole birthday party set up for my mom.  Her birthday is Monday.  It was an awesome surprise.  They had birthday balloons, cake, awesome brunch food, and even some mimosas.  Yes, I had a couple very light-on-the-alcohol mimosas.  It’s my mom’s birthday party!  Come on! 

As you can see my mom enjoyed herself and that hat.  

My friends gave my parents tickets to Million Dollar Quartet for tomorrow night along with enough money on a gift card for a good dinner at Las Tablas, a really good Argentinian steak house pretty close to the theater.  They need the break, I’m sure.  Happy birthday, mom.

If that wasn’t enough my friends pulled out a couple surprise gifts.  I said, “It’s my mom’s birthday, not mine!  What the heck!”  I felt guilty and undeserving.  I don’t know what strings they pulled, but they gave me an actual record album and two cds, all autographed with personal notes by the Smashing Pumpkins.  Very, very cool.  The other gift, which I am still shocked and humbled by, was a Blackhawks Jersey.  Jonathan Toews, #19.  Oh yeah, and it was signed by the entire Blackhawks team!  ??!!?!? Are you kidding me???? And if that wasn’t enough, there was a letter from the Blackhawks staff saying they heard about my injury and that they wished me a speedy recovery.  How the heck? It was signed with little notes by all of the staff.  Incredible.  I have great friends and now I’ll have a good excuse to break out of rehab for Blackhawks games!

I pretty much crashed after that.  I’ve been in bed since then.  Great day.

G’night,

Chip

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This is the toy I was talking about yesterday that Jessica used with me to practice balance.  It’s actually really hard to do for me.  But pretty fun - might have to get one of those for home.

RIC day 18 - Poker

New thing: Countdown to taking off the brace: 61 days.  I’m making the date 12 weeks after surgery, which is the guess of when it will be taken off.  However in reality they’ll take x-rays starting at week 6 checking to see how my spinal fusion is coming along and whether or not I can stop using the brace.  

Friday!  Friday is good because it means rest for the weekend.  Today was jam-packed.  5.5 hours of scheduled activities.

9-10am - Lokomat.  It went way better than yesterday.  They tried a different harness that prevented my brace to ride up and crush my ribs, which it did yesterday.  I went 30 minutes.  I’m supposed to visualize running or walking while I’m on it to get the neurons firing.  It’s hard to do that without strongly missing it, but I am thinking it will get easier.

10-11am - Lesson on wheelchairs- types, specs, etc.

11am-noon - Lesson on wheelchairs part 2 - how to assemble and disassemble them.  Frankly these two hours were not fun as I didn’t want to think of life in a wheelchair.  I still have hope of walking.

Noon - Lunch with Sam.  I know Sam from IBM - he used to be a kind of mentor/matrixed boss for me.  I hadn’t talked with Sam in maybe a few years so it was good to catch up.  Also simultaneously Janice met with my dad to go over marketing ideas for Papa John’s.  It was tough to not be a part of that, knowing that my focus is rehab.

1-2pm - Mike (rec. therapist) had me and Tony watch a video called 28 sports in 28 minutes.  Basically tons of things you can still do even though you can’t use your legs.  Horseback riding, surfing (you lay on the board face down), skiing - both water and snow, swimming, scuba-diving, racing, basketball, rugby… lots, really.  Some were goofy like self-defense, pool, archery, and hunting.  The one of self-defense had a guy tackle an “attacker” to the ground and get him in a choke hold.  That would be really embarrassing for the mugger, I’m sure.  

2-3pm - Balancing with Jessica.  I’m getting good at my transfers, at least.  We played Othello and then used this toy thing that zips back and forth.  Hard to describe but I’ll try and post a video soon.  Then I had to pass this 5lb (or so) medicine ball around my back like the basketball drill over and over again without falling over.  That was pretty tough.  

3-5:30pm - Hang with parents, eat some of the sweets people have sent (awesome) and rest.

5:30-6:30pm (ran half an hour over if you are trying to count the 5.5 hours) - Psych session with Dr. Sweet.  Good stuff again.  I told her about this blog and she actually said that was very good therapy for me.  Apparently in her private practice she tells people they can either journal or get a new therapist.  This is basically journalling so she was happy.  She also said that while I might be having a tough time, it’s good that I’m being honest with myself about things.  I’m not sure I actually am, but glad she thinks so!  I’m still banking on walking again.  I’m not ready to deal with the idea of life in a wheelchair.  It’s just too depressing to think about. I can deal with it if that’s what ends up happening, but as long as there’s hope of me walking again I just can’t think about it.  

7-10pm - Poker with the guys (and Nina).  The head guy for my hall said even though visiting hours ended at 8, we could use the cafeteria since nobody would be there.  Done!  We play poker every once in a while and the guys were cool enough to change the venue to the RIC.  It was different to play without alcohol but we had a good time anyway.

Left to right: Me, Dan, Nina, Rich, Erik, Woody, Doug.

Good times.  

G’night all.  

Chip

RIC day 17 - Impatient Inpatient

That’s me.  The impatient inpatient.  I’m sure it’s obvious to you that I am eager for things to happen.  Others on my floor are able to pee without a catheter, one guy started walking, another moved his big toe.  All great news for good people, but it’s hard not to want that for myself.  I want to move my big toe!  Come on big toe!  

Today was pretty good.  Just painful.  For some reason I was in more pain than usual today.  

9am - Get dressed OT session with Jessica.  I managed to get completely dressed on my own - shoes, everything.  She just handed me the clothes. Then I got my brace on by myself which consisted of me wiggling around in bed for a while, most likely looking ridiculous.  I don’t care, the brace got on.  

11am - Group therapy.  The usual shoulder stuff.

12am - Lexis and Janice, both rock stars for our PJs stores, stopped by to say hi.  Lexis had an appointment close by for her pregnancy (week 14 I think).  I nicknamed her “The Beast” for some of the amazing things she has done at work.  There’s no stopping her.

Quick lunch, then upstairs to work on the lokomat again.  I “walked” for 30 minutes this time.  It was really painful.  I think they made the brace/harness too tight or something.  Back on it tomorrow at 9am, so hopefully it will be better.

A couple doors down from my room, a new patient was admitted a couple days ago.  You can hear him yelling day and night.  The nurses come in a lot and his typical response is, “GO AWAY!!! GET AWAY FROM ME!”  There is another man in the room that usually just groans and yells for no apparent purpose.  I asked the nurse about it and she said, “How do you like our new patients?  Aren’t they a scream?”  I couldn’t help but laugh.  I realize that was probably in poor taste but people laugh at odd things in here.  One has dementia and the other has some other mental issue.  Both are hard of hearing.  The funny thing is that they are in the same room, and yet neither hears the other yelling.  They are asked if the yelling of their roommate bothers them and they BOTH say, “What yelling?  What roommate?”  Of course everyone here wants them to get better, but the situation is just so unique I thought I’d share.

The prayers for today, on top of the two guys yelling I just mentioned, go to Sandra.  Sandra is leaving soon.  She has been a quadriplegic for many years now.  She was readmitted due to bed sores and is leaving for surgery soon to have them fixed.  She is very sweet and almost always has a smile on her face.  We are usually in group exercise together.  Please pray for Sandra.

I think she just got a haircut in that pic.  I don’t remember it looking like that. 

Tomorrow is another day.  It will have it’s own unique set of challenges which we should all face head-on.  At least that’s my style.  Why let it eat away and fester and bother you in the back of your mind when you can just deal with it and move on?  

I will do my best to be patient.  

Dear Lord, give me patience.  Give me strength.  Give me wisdom.  Give me guidance.  Show me what you want of me that will accomplish Your will in the most effective manner.  Help me to utilize each opportunity and interaction to better others’ lives.  Make me positive.  Keep negativity away from me.  Let my love for You shine through so it is obvious why I act the way I do.  Dear Lord, please heal me, mind and body.  Please let me walk again.  I will do Your will either way, but I’d really like to walk.  Please be with Sandra.  Fill her with the Holy Spirit so that she can feel Your strength and take her challenges head-on.  Let her inspire others.  Heal her, oh Lord.  Please be with her.  In Christ’s name, Amen.  

G’night

Chip

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RIC day 16 - Lokomat and Pool

I hope there are people that are moved, inspired, motivated, whatever by this blog.  If not, then there’s really no point to it.  

Today was certainly a day of new experiences.  I slept great, too!  Thanks, Ambien (or 1/2 of one, actually)!  

9am - Worked out upper body to get the blood flowing so I wouldn’t pass out during lokomat.

10am - Lokomat.  Very cool.  Goal was 5-10 minutes after all the adjustments and measurements were made.  I stopped at 18.  I’ll do it again tomorrow.  Video positing shortly after this post.

11am - Lesson on rights for the disabled.  Frankly I thought it was a little over the top, but good to know they are there.  I can make any request to any employer and basically get any job anywhere, so long as I can do the work in conditions that I feel are appropriate.  If I want an elevator installed and they can afford it, they have to do it.  Seems like a lot.  I could just work downstairs.  

noon - Lunch with Ron and Ilianna.  They are awesome.  Talked a little work, too.

2pm - Pool therapy.  Really very cool.  I felt weightless between my foam brace and the foam rolls.  I tried squats at the end which was a lot of mental work.  

The least amount of pain I’ve felt since the accident.  Definitely getting in the pool again.  

So cool day!  A lot less physical work and a lot more mental work- trying to make my legs move or assist with their motions.  They want me to focus on that to stimulate reactivation.  

Prayer today goes to Liz (see below).  Liz is always smiling and is also a formidable opponent at balloon volleyball.  She has a disease I won’t attempt to name that starts with Posterior… It caused her ligaments around her spine to turn to bone - sounds like they calcified or something like that.  The hardening of her ligaments caused the communication between her legs and brain to cease, so she can’t walk, but has feeling, like me.  She had surgery on her spine, which was unsuccessful.  She is a very kind soul and today was her last day at RIC.  Please pray for Liz. Here she is (the one not wearing a Bears hat)

So that’s it.  I hope you like the lokomat video.  It made me feel like Ironman.  Simultaneously it made me acutely aware that I require a $250,000 machine to walk anywhere close to normally.  It really is a remarkable machine.  It will measure any assistance that I give it in 4 different areas.  So even if I barely help, it’ll pick it up on a graph shown in front of me. 

G’night!

Chip

RIC day 15 - Ups, Downs, and Treats

Let me start of with a big THANKS to everyone that is sending me stuff.  I think I’m good for a while on food, honestly.  I love it all, but I have plenty!  I try to personally thank everyone but I miss a lot so here are a bunch I want to thank - 

Emily Myers – Kendama Toys – very fun, Ilianna and Ron – Pound cake and Maker’s Mark fudge (my first alcohol since the accident with these today!  Can’t have real alcohol because of my meds but this was a welcome exception to the rule! so good), Debbie Coriell – Bourbon balls (more cheating with alcohol and delicious, thanks!), Erin Wymore – Cake Batter Puppy Chow (oddly great), Ron and Jennifer Allen – Chocolates and Jesus Calling devotional book, Tom and Lisa Trimmer – iTunes card, The Hermitage – Gift basket, Cousin Ellee – Popcorn tin (my mom eats every day), Aunt Cha – Big thing of nuts and also a bunch of Mentos.  

My dad had contacted Apple customer service to see if I could get my cracked iPhone fixed.  They gave me a discount on a new iPhone which I will probably not use.  However, the crazy and shocking part was getting a letter in the mail today from Apple Customer Service saying something like, “Chip, really glad the surgery went well.  God bless you.  Much love to you and Rebecca. - Sara”  I mean… have you ever heard of this??? It came with a $15 iTunes gift card.  Shocking and awesome.

Tons of cards from lots of loving people.  The ones with drawings from kids are the coolest.  Sorry but they are.  One very cool card today was from Rebecca’s sister all the way from Vatican City.  Thanks, Beth/Sister Mary Benedicta!  

….

It seems that every day here is long and exhausting.  I woke up this morning irritable at not getting enough sleep again.  On top of that I had PT at 7:30am, meaning I had to get up earlier to get dressed, brace on, and into the wheelchair.  I got in a nap around 10.  Dr. Anschell visited me and I asked him questions and got some good answers.  1) The guy that comes by every night at 4am to give me a shot will be no more!  I’ll get the shot at noon now.  That’s great!  2) I can sleep on my stomach tonight.  Huge!  I’m so excited.  Kind of nervous, actually.  Don’t want to mess up my back.  3) They’ll start x-raying me at week 6 to see if my brace can come off.  They expect week 10 or 12.  Okay this is not good news.  I hate that thing.  

7:30-8:30am PT - I was in a sour mood.  We did endurance training on the hand bike.  Then practiced a few transfers and stretches.  Also pushing a giant ball out in front of me and pulling it back with both hands.  It was actually extremely hard.

10am - Quick nap

11am-noon - Group Therapy.  Hard work on the shoulders.

Noon - Business meeting.  Not sure having a business meeting here is the best idea.  Maybe later.  Quick visit by Erin to drop off the cake batter puppy chow.

1pm - Originally LIFE center group lesson.  Cancelled.  Ended up talking with Rebecca for a while with video.  Definitely put me in a better mood.  I thought she looked better than I had ever seen her.  It’s tough here.  You start appreciating things way more. 

2pm-3pm -  I practiced some transfers (moving to and from the wheelchair) - transfered to the mat and into a car they have for practice indoors here which was very cool.  It’s a Mercedes, even.  Lots of donors for this place.  Then we had some real fun.  They upped all my goals for the week since I had already achieved most of them.  One of the new ones is wheelchair management outdoors.  Since the weather was iffy today, I ended up practicing wheelies.  I can now do a wheelie for over a minute and also a 360 while doing a wheelie.  That was really fun.  We tried jumping a curb but my brace makes it impossible to lean forward so that was a no go.  

3:30-4pm - Dr. Sweet psych session.  She made me lie down in bed and do this relaxation therapy, relieving pressure, stress, etc.  I visualized being on a beach I had been to in Mozambique.  That kind of thing.  It worked wonders.

4-5pm - Totally re-energized from the wheelies and Dr. Sweet session, I tackled several goals.  I did a much better job of moving my legs around in a practice to get in and out of bed.  Then I moved in and out of the groin stretch position.  Getting much better all around.  Transfers were much better, too.  We decided to tackle a real challenge and stand up without the help of that contraption I’ve been using.  This time I just used a set of parallel bars and pushed myself to a standing position.  It requires you to use upper body strength to hold the position, but it went really well.  Couple pics below.  

Okay so that was cool enough.  But Kate, the therapist in the pic, asked me to squeeze my butt if I could.  Nobody had tested that, yet.  Mainly just kicking tests.  So I tried flexing there and she said I had a small muscle response in the top of my rear.  I didn’t believe her - seemed to me like either somehow my abs doing it or my lower back muscles.  She insisted it was my upper glute.  So if she’s right, that’s great news.  She also thought my hip flexors were doing something.  Again, I thought it was my abs, but she said the action was too low to be abs.  Fingers crossed!  

My parents were gone most of the day today so they were pretty upset they missed all this cool stuff.  My mom probably would’ve had a heart attack if she saw my wheelie practice, so maybe it was good they weren’t here.  

Tomorrow is a big day.  I get on the lokomat for the first time, which should be exciting.  Martha, another therapist, told me that the lokomat quite often will result in return of motion after the 3rd or 4th time.  More high hopes being set.  Kate mentioned (as did Dr. Sweet) that people that have my levels of sensation usually get at least some ambulatory movement.  Very encouraging stuff.  Time will tell.

Also tomorrow will be my first pool therapy session.  It’s supposed to make you float more easily, somehow.  Today it was set at 86 degrees, so I’m looking forward to that.  

Today a bad day turned into a great day.  Thanks again for all the prayers and support.

Here’s a verse that fits nicely with what I was trying to say in my first message after the surgery about where I get my strength.  Romans 15:13:

I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.

G’night, all.  
Chip

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Transferring into a tub.

RIC day 14 - Psychology

This morning totally sucked.  Scratch that – last night totally sucked, which caused the start of my day to totally suck.  Imagine this schedule combined with pain in your back and not being able to really adjust to be comfortable in bed at night:

1am – Cath, then roll over with assistance of technician

4:15am – Wake up to a tech standing over bed in the dark.  Say, “Geez, you scared me.” Tech responds with, “Sorry.  As long as you’re up, are you ready for your blood thinner shot?” 

5:30am – Wake up to cath again, then tech. helps roll to other side.

6:15am – Wake up for vitals check – blood pressure, temp,  pulse

7:30am – Dress with tech’s assistance to get ready for the day.

8am – Go to physical therapy

8:30am – 10am – get a break.  No wait, someone shows up at 9am and says that I now have more physical therapy from 9-10am. 

10-11am – Trip outside with recreational therapy guy to go check out the RIC gym

11am-12pm – Group Exercise

noon – get some lunch and get in bed for a quick bite and then nap an hour

1pm – do some work and rest a little more

2-2:30pm – Psychology session with Dr. Sweet

3-4pm – More physical therapy

4-5pm – Group psychology

The morning was really, really rough.  But the nap helped immensely after lunch.   At my 8am session I was able to “stand” again, this time without feeling sick or overheating, even though I had come straight from bed.  That was encouraging.  I stood for 20 minutes or so.  Sara also informed me that the reason I qualify for the lokomat (which I’ll do Wednesday for the first time) is because of the pins and needles I feel in my left leg.  It used to be that you had to have some sort of motion in your leg(s) to qualify.  But as I mentioned before, new research shows strong correlation between motion and the pins and needles.  So I hope it’s a big plus for all the pain I feel in my left leg. 

The RIC gym is a couple blocks away and really cool.  All the machines are made so that you can do it from your wheelchair if you want.  They also have a cycling group with special bikes that are basically fancy fast wheelchairs and handcycles (bike with your hands).  I guess they take them out on the lake shore path, which is really cool.  This is Mike and I headed to the gym.  

I was accepted into water therapy training, too.  So Wednesday, on top of getting into the lokomat, I’ll hopefully have a session in the pool here which is supposedly 85 degrees and designed to make you float easily, somehow.  Should be interesting and a nice change of pace.

I kind of had a breakthrough session with Dr. Sweet, the psychologist, at our 2pm session.  She came to my room and asked how I was doing.  I told her how infuriating it is that there are all these positive signs, which should be GOOD news, but that I still can’t move anything in my legs!  For instance, if I do the lokomat for weeks and still can’t walk on my own, I’ll be very frustrated.  She said that’s normal but that I had a drive that was much higher than average and am probably more accustomed to effort = output.  Since that’s not the only factor with spinal cord injuries, I can’t think that I am failing.  She then pointed out how confused I looked and kept repeating to me that I am doing everything I can and that I’m not failing.  It took a few times to hit me.  I’ve definitely been increasingly upset at my lack of movement in my legs, especially since everyone else is increasingly expectant.  This morning I wanted to throw my brace through the window.  I keep having these dreams where I’m running or walking and then realize I’m not supposed to be able to do that (still in the dream), so I’m more careful but filled with joy (again, still in the dream).  Then I wake up and, as an example, a strange tech is hovering over me in the dark asking me if I’m ready for a shot.  Not the best transition.  So her timing was good.  I feel a little better and ready to take on tomorrow.  She was really great and encouraging - and best of all, she made sense. 

Afternoon physical therapy involved me practicing more transfers, this time in and out of an actual tub/shower.  The facilities here are truly incredible.  Anyway I’ll post a video in a second about that.  Pretty tough stuff but I feel like I can at least do it now.

I had a flurry of visitors all show up at once tonight, which is perfect, really.  Jason (aka Quiggy, aka Q diddy), Erik (aka Ironman, aka the Viking), Jake (aka Jakey), Joe (aka… Joe Cool), and Jeremy (aka J Rose).  Nina (aka Ninapedia) showed up after this pic was taken.  Also Erik visited the other day, which I forgot to mention.  I think that gets him a point in some game they construed related to this blog.  Not sure :) 

Aunt Cha (Cha, you say? Yes, Cha, short for Charlene, named after the same person I was named after, my grandpa, her dad, Charles) and Uncle Lee need to get a major shout out.  I’m fairly sure I’ve received at least a card from them every single day since my accident.  She also sent me a care package.  Lots of love coming from the Humphrey (their last name) side of the family!  Thank you guys!  I’m sad to hear you aren’t throwing the Derby party, though.  I think you should.  Such a great tradition!

Connie Hall also needs a shout out.  A close friend to my parents, she has been incredible with how much she has orchestrated and helped out, from cards to flowers to care packages to pulling strings for my parents’ hotel room, etc.  Thank you Connie.  You kick butt.

The prayer for today should go to the girl in the pic below.  She’s just a teenager, but she’s going through far more than I am.  She is sick but has a strong heart.  She’s also my neighbor here.  Please pray for her and her family.  This is Alex and her mom, Annette.  I’m not using a description of her illness to protect their privacy.

Gnight all.  

Chip

 

RIC day 13 - Sun and brunch -

Nothing til 10am this morning, so got a little more sleep.  I needed it.

10am - Electro Stimulation with Martha.  She put two electrodes on my thigh and two on my hamstring and made them alternate flexing.  Left leg hurt quite a bit.  It felt strangely good to have voltage passing through my right leg.  After that I lifted some weights. 

While I was lifting weights I met a guy named Kip that was hurt on April 5, days after me.  He fell off the 2nd story of a building.  His injury is identical to mine - crushed T12.  He even had the exact same surgery.  We talked and it turns out he has some motion in his left leg, but no sensation below his calves.  So it was interesting to compare.  It’ll be good to see how each of us progress since we are so similarly hurt.  We even joked that our names our similar - Chip and Kip.  There’s already another Chip on this floor.  What are the chances of Chip, Chip and Kip being 3 out of 20 patients?  If you read this, please pray for Kip.  The other Chip has had repeated complications that all started with him trying to get more motion in his arm that was hurting from Arthritis.  Multiple surgeries and a fall into a bathtub that broke a couple vertebrae.  Now he’s here.  Please pray for him, too, and everyone else that needs healing.

11am - “Hot Topics” class on Therma- regulation.  It’s pretty typical for patients with spinal cord injuries to constantly feel either too hot or too cold.  I am usually too cold, especially when I take my brace off and my sweaty shirt is exposed.  Then I go from freezing to sweating.  Really hard to regulate.  This class taught me nothing, really, other than that there are apparently some dorky looking vests out there that keep you cool in the heat. 

Work, then brunch out with the parents at the Local Root, a new place about a block away.  I had Huevos Rancheros and some fruit.  I ate almost all of it, which felt pretty good.  My parents went nuts over the coffee.

Then we headed back slowly as the sun was coming out and it felt awesome.  I went up to work out a bit and play my dad at checkers (he won, somehow), then headed back out just in time to meet some friends - Brandon J., Brandon N., Brady, Geoff, Andrea,  and Rich and Sandy, a couple from Louisville in on business that came by to say hi.  We chatted by the track on Chicago Ave.  The sun felt awesome and pushing myself around that much felt good, too.  Brandon J. brought some banana bread that his wife Kate had made.  Good stuff!  Geoff and Andrea got me a sweet Cubs hat. 

5pm - Go back, talk to Rebecca, get in bed, eat dinner, pass out for a bit.

6:45pm - Several friends came at 6pm and waited for me to wake up.  Esther and Louise brought me entirely too much food from Costco, and also some homemade banana bread.  Also delicious.  I now have more food than I know what to do with, so you are welcome to a snack if you stop by!  Rich and Martha had waited as well, so we had a nice group.  

Not sure why Esther and Louise look like they’re about to pounce in this pic.  It was very odd looking up to them as they are both pretty short.  

That’s about it.  Early morning tomorrow with 8am PT.  

G’night,

Chip

RIC day 12 -

It’ll be 3 weeks since the accident, tomorrow.  I can tell improvement in my ribs, but they are still painful when I try and lift weights and things like that.  My back is considerably less painful than it was a couple weeks ago.  The pain pills are really just to get me through the workouts and long sits in my wheelchair, now.  

The weekends are lighter here.  At 8:30 I practiced dressing myself with a little help from Jessica.  I managed to get pants on this time.  It went alright.

At 11am I had group exercise, which somehow involved me telling everyone about trends and market research with Papa John’s and McDonald’s.  The therapist was overjoyed when I told her the garlic sauce is not actually butter at all, has 150 calories if you consume the entire cup, and is mainly sesame seed oil, which has good fat.  Out of 17 grams of fat, only 3 of those are saturated.  No trans fat.  The rest is all “good” fat.  Anyway, I digress…

I felt great after group exercise and wanted to try standing up again, but with the light activity on the weekend had to wait until after 1 for a trainer to be there (like a lifeguard at a pool).  My parents helped me get into the standup contraption thingy (see day 7) and I was able to stand for 45 minutes.  Way better than yesterday.  Clearly having the blood pumping is key.

Throughout the day I taught my parents how to do some of the admin stuff I have to do for PJs, so they can help out.  They are awesome.

We decided to break out of the hospital and go catch a movie.   I got to video chat with Rebecca a bit on the way, which was pretty sweet.  Her brother, Chris, just got to Mozambique to visit with her and help her as she gets ready to move back to the US.  

The sidewalks were pretty slanted so that required a lot of effort in pushing the wheelchair, but the movie was awesome.  We saw “Oz”, which is like a prequel to the Wizard of Oz.  It was really very good, I thought.  Really original.  There were, ironically, 2 times in the movie that involved a person or thing that couldn’t walk and was very outspoken about how much they wanted to be able to walk again.  That was a little tough.  

We were going to have dinner out after that but I was feeling pretty rough from being in the wheelchair so long.  So we headed back and I got in bed for some checkers and mexican train domino’s.  I won every game.  I’m starting to think they are letting me.

I don’t have any pics today other than one with my increasingly skinny dad:

Seriously, dad, eat more.  

Speaking of which, I weighed in - including workout clothes, brace, and shoes - at 189 today.  I’m not sure how much all that stuff weighs but I figure that puts me at about 186-187.  That’s really light for me.  I’m scared I’m losing too much leg muscle from the weeks of inactivity there.

Okay I’ll end this one on a Psalm which made me cry like a baby tonight when I read it out loud.  Especially verse 3.  Psalm 6:2-10 - 

² Have compassion on me, Lord, for I am weak.
    Heal me, Lord, for my bones are in agony.
³ I am sick at heart.
    How long, O Lord, until you restore me?

⁴ Return, O Lord, and rescue me.
    Save me because of your unfailing love.
⁵ For the dead do not remember you.
    Who can praise you from the grave?^[b]

⁶ I am worn out from sobbing.
    All night I flood my bed with weeping,
    drenching it with my tears.
⁷ My vision is blurred by grief;
    my eyes are worn out because of all my enemies.

⁸ Go away, all you who do evil,
    for the Lord has heard my weeping.
⁹ The Lord has heard my plea;
    the Lord will answer my prayer.
¹⁰ May all my enemies be disgraced and terrified.
    May they suddenly turn back in shame.

 

G’night,

Chip

This is Joe (and my mom) - the guy I mentioned in RIC day 10.  Pray for him.  I’ll be adding new folks on here whenever I get their stories and hopefully photos.  Joe’s a good guy and he left inpatient care today.  He’ll be back doing outpatient care, but he’s independent enough to live with his sister now.  He’ll have to take a train every day in that brace to get to outpatient care.  

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Somewhat funny video of me trying to practice balancing by playing Jessica (my OT) at wii.  I almost fell backwards toward the end.  But I won, so it was worth it.

RIC day 11

I’m gonna keep this one brief.  I’m really tired.  

9am - I went straight from the bed to PT, where Sara got me in the stand-up contraption again.  This time I didn’t do so well.  I got nauseous within minutes and had to sit back down.  After I felt better I stood back up, only to get back down a few minutes later again.  This repeated a few times.  She decided next time I should be up for a bit and out of bed before standing, because the lack of muscle tone in my legs makes even more blood rush there than normal.  The more interesting part was that she told me the reason we’re doing this is to prepare for the lokomat, which is a fancy machine they have here on the 12th floor.  Here’s a video of it being used: 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PufPyEHDFpQ

Starting next Wednesday I’m going to get on that thing 4 times a week.  The idea is that the movement of walking with help my neurons and brain to remember and reactivate so that I can get some return of movement.  We’ll see…

11am was group exercise including some more fun volleyball.

Lunch brought a few visitors in: Steve, Janice, and Erin.  

After a good talk with them, I went back into more PT.  This time it was practicing balance by playing the wii while sitting on a mat.  The difference is that I couldn’t hold onto anything for support.  I’m pretty sure I won every game against Jessica.  Pretty fun.  

A visit from Dan, then a nap, then visits from Louise, Jake, and Rich.  And Diego, if you count the guy that delivered the pizzas.  We coordinated with the floor to provide PJs for dinner tonight.  It was primarily for the staff and the families of patients, since the patients ate a little earlier.  But some of them got food, too.  It was a success, I’d say.  Pic below.

That’s about it.  I’m really tired, and tomorrow is another day. 

Chip

RIC day 10 - Bleh

Honestly today was rough.  I think the lack of a good night’s sleep got to me today.  Each night they wake me up every 4-5 hours to do my catheter.  Then they wake me up at 6am every day to give me a shot of blood thinner.  So if my schedule has me cathing at 5am, it doesn’t work out so well.  At 6:30am they take my blood pressure and heart rate.  At 7:30am they wake me up for breakfast.  I’m usually not asleep through the breaks, either, since they also have to turn me from side to side to keep me from having bed sores, not to mention I’m just not used to sleeping on my back.  Not being able to move your legs makes it hard to get comfortable.  Okay I’m done complaining.  I just miss a good night’s rest so much.  

After feeling miserable this morning, at 9am I had therapy with Jessica, my OT.  We worked on getting myself dressed with as little help as possible.  She had these straps made that velcro around my leg and provide loops for me to pull.  So using those, I was able to put my own underwear and shorts on for the first time since the accident.  Felt good but honestly it wore me out.  

At 11am I had PT with Svetlana.  Man, what a workout!  I felt way better as we trained.  We practiced transferring to and from the wheelchair using better leverage and positioning techniques.  Once I got better at that, we tried getting myself into “bed”, using the training mats here.  So far I’ve relied on others to pull up my legs into bed. This was practice for me to do it myself.  I can’t tell you how hard this was, but I was able to make a lot of progress with it.  My leg started spasming and she got excited thinking I was doing it, but alas, no, it was just a spasm.  My mom got a couple good videos of this PT which I’ll try and post later.  The staff here is slowly getting used to the fact that my parents are basically making a documentary out of this.  They are constantly taking photos and videos.  Pretty funny.  I feel like I’m in a play in the 3rd grade or something.

1pm was group therapy with Jessica.  Nothing too exciting.  But afterwards, I spoke with Joe, another patient here.  He’s always smiling and laughing so I wanted to get to know him better.  He told me his story.

Joe was working construction when a machine malfunctioned, dropping heavy sheet metal on him, crushing him.  He broke his C6, C7, T1, and L1.  He also fractured his leg.  

Just some reference there for ya.

The C6 and C7, specifically, were pushed in opposite directions, nearly severing his spinal cord, but not quite.  They had to perform surgery on him in multiple places, including pushing aside his esophagus.  He couldn’t talk for 3 weeks.  Miraculously, he lost zero sensation or motor skills.  He can move around fine and walk, however he’s in a brace much larger than mine that goes around his neck, as well.  He’ll be released from here on Saturday.  The goal is independence, which he achieved quickly.  He will continue rehab for a long time and doesn’t get out of his brace for months.  

Today I looked around during the group exercise, looked at my parents, and realized I am extremely lucky.  Not only am I lucky because my injury is not as bad as others here, but also because my network of friends, family, and “prayer warriors” is pretty extensive.  While I am extremely thankful for the prayers, I am feeling selfish and unworthy that they are all directed at me and my family.  So please pray for Joe today.  We both agreed that the accident makes you appreciate every little thing in life.  Everything starts looking like a luxury.  Going to the bathroom? A luxury.  And as I said in my first kind of intense message/manifesto, legs are a luxury, too.  He’s a good guy, so please pray for him.  I’ll try to post a pic of him later.  I didn’t want to make him feel weird so chickened out of asking him today.  Thanks.  Tomorrow I’ll ask for you to pray for someone else, but just pray for everyone here, and everyone going through any kind of illness or injury, for that matter.  

James 5:16 - Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results

2pm - A little more workout on my own with the bike that moves my legs for me.  

3-5:30pm - A long talk with Rebecca.  I won’t go into details because it’s private, but this ordeal brings up extremely hard questions for a relationship.  I realized today that while I am considerably strong when it comes to my own personal goals and motivations, I felt/feel extremely guilty and like a burden to Rebecca.  It doesn’t seem fair that she has to suffer and give up things in life because of my situation.  Same for my parents, but much moreso for Rebecca.  So it was a good talk because I discovered that about myself.  She has been strong when I am weak.  I don’t deserve her.  Rebecca, if you’re reading this, sorry if I shouldn’t share publicly. 

After a quick dinner and more mexican train dominos with the parents, I crashed, until they woke me up again for the nightly bathroom rituals. 

Two people in the last two days have said that I have inspired them to run a marathon or half marathon at some point.  Not sure why me getting hit by a van inspired that, but… great!  I told one of the therapists here, Tim, that I’m glad I did a fair amount with my legs before the accident, at least.  He wants to run a marathon by the time he’s 30.  He’s 27.  So I said, “What the heck?  Why did you give yourself 3 years?  It takes 4-5 months to train for a marathon.  Scott and Patti Whonsetler - you said in your card that you’d probably run the mini marathon in Louisville next year.  That’s awesome!  Why the heck are you aiming for something more than a year away?  That’s not the only race around.  Find something in August or September and shoot for that.  Also, thank you for your amazing help with everything, Scott.  You are helping a lot.  Sorry for returning the favor by giving you and Patti a hard time and calling you out!  Blame Patti - she wrote the card.  

Everyone else, I’m glad this is somehow inspiring to some of you.  I’m glad some good might come of this.  Want more of a push?  I’m happy to give it!….

If you have goals in your life or a “bucket list”, then what are you waiting for?  When was the last time you accomplished one of those goals?  Last year? 2 years ago? Ever? Life is short.  Every day we have is a gift from God.  One of the things that was tough to talk about with Rebecca was how our dream books (books we both have full of goals we want to accomplish in life.. read The Dream Manager - Matthew Kelly) might be altered a fair amount by my injury. But there are still loads of goals I can still achieve, and that motivates me to push through each day here.  I’m not done, yet.  Plenty to do.

So anyway, yeah, go do something you’ve never done before that you’ve always wanted to do.  You never know, you might get hit by a van and not be able to walk :) Or worse.  

I love you all.

Chip

RIC day 9 - Staples

Thanks to everyone for the cards, emails, messages, etc.  My parents and I read the cards, especially, together and usually there are a few tears.  But then again my mom cried at my 5th grade graduation.  She cries about everything.  

Correction from previous blog: My friend Jake doesn’t actually have 90% free time now.  I was making a joke.  Sorry Jake.  My mom felt that I needed to point that out.  

Response to a repeated question: My main injury is a crushed T12 vertebrae.  The surgeon, Dr. Muro, at Illinois Masonic on Diversey Ave in Chicago, fused a restructured T12 with the two above (T10-11) and the two below (L1-2), using a kind of cage of 4 titanium rods going through all the vertebrae.  Other than that I cracked 2 ribs.  Also my helmet somehow caved in a little in the back which peeled back a little skin on the back of my head.  It bled a lot which concerned them at first but it ended up just being a serious scrape.  No other real injury, shockingly, other than a couple bruises that have never hurt.  I’m not really sure but I think I just tensed up when I collided with the van and kind of just bounced off of it.  

I’ll go with the time format again to attempt brevity.  I always end up writing more than I planned.  If I haven’t mentioned it, this has become very good therapy for me.  It’s basically my journal.  It helps me remember the small victories of each day and also holds me accountable during the day since I know I’ll be writing about it later.  I don’t want to have to say, “Not much happened.  I was lazy and skipped everything.”

9-9:30am - Lesson on skin care.  If I don’t take pressure breaks, I’ll get sores on my skin from sitting in the wheelchair too long, or not moving in bed, etc.

9:30-10am - Sensation test.  Eyes closed, reporting what I feel to the therapist.  First a light cotton ball then a pin prick.  Apparently the feeling of those are two different nerve systems.  Interestingly, I felt the light cotton throughout most of my right leg and a lot of my left leg (and feet).  For the pin prick, I had to tell him if he was using the sharp end of a safety pin or the dull end.  My right leg felt all dull and my left leg felt all pin pricks, even though he kept it fairly even with both.  Supposedly the pin prick sensation is closely related to motion neurons, which would suggest my left leg has a hope of movement again.  Good news!  

11am-noon - “Hot Topics” session explaining our ideal dietary habits

noon-1pm - Lunch and work.

1-2pm - Group therapy.  New girl came from the 10th floor which is all brain injuries.  I don’t think she was used to us being limited with our spines.  It was really hard and I had to request lighter weights.  

2-3pm - This was cool.  I got to sit up with my legs stretched out in front of me, which I haven’t been able to do, yet, because of the strain on my back.  It felt amazing.  

The goal was to do it 2 minutes.  I guess it usually hurts people.  I did it for like 30 minutes before she made me switch to the groin stretch position that also felt great and for which I didn’t need to pull myself up by a strap.

3 goals for the week met in one hour!  (the 3rd was to do a catheter by myself during therapy, which I was doing at 2pm… but then I’ve been doing those myself for days now).

By the way, I keep forgetting to mention that around here they refer to my brace as the turtle shell.  It’s perfectly named, because I’m 10x stronger with it on.  As soon as it’s off I can barely move and am really weak.  2-3 people sent cards with turtle themes, which I thought was pretty ironic.

3-4:15pm - Tango (iPhone app to talk over internet) with Rebecca in Mozambique.  

4:15pm - Alone, successfully attempt to go from wheelchair to bed.  

4:25pm - Therapist comes in to give me a wheelchair backpack and simultaneously congratulates me and scolds me for my risky behavior in the transfer to bed.  

4:40pm - They took the staples out of my back.  OWWWWWWW!!!! They said it wouldn’t hurt!!! Liars!  Holy cow that sucked.  Making it worse, I hadn’t had a pain pill for 5 hours.  Before and after photos below.  49 staples, all with varying levels of pain for removal.  Sorry if this is kind of gross…

Those string-looking things are from where the drains were.  Those will go in a few days.  

Dear Lord, please give me strength.  Give me courage.  Give me hope.  Give me healing.  Dear God, please help me to focus on what is important in life, to see clearly, to be wise in my choices, to love as You would have me love, to follow Your plan in a way that would please You the most.  Please guide me and show me the way.  My will is to do Your will.  My life is in your hands.  Thank you for all the support of my family and friends.  Thank you for giving me this wonderful life and all the blessings I have received.  Thank you for this day.  It was a good day.  In Jesus’ name, Amen. 

G’night.

RIC day 8

Just over a week here now.  I’m happy with the progress so far.  I have to keep telling myself, “One day at a time.”  They really do push that here.  You don’t get the day’s agenda until 7pm the night before.  Everything has a purpose here.  I found out that the meal vouchers in the cafeteria can’t be used unless I’m present.  They said the idea is that it’s also part of therapy and forces you out of bed, which I was speculating about before.  

My parents are being over-the-top supportive.  They are here every day.  My dad went around and did business errands for me.  I am starting to feel bad that I am the focus of their lives.  But at the same time, if they weren’t here things would be much harder.  

For some time now I have been going through the “Bible in a year” reading plan as part of the YouVersion bible app.  I’m way behind but halfway through the bible.  Literally - 50%.  It tells you.  Anyway, my parents suggested we do the day’s reading before they leave each night.  It usually has a couple old testament chapters, a new testament chapter, a psalm and a verse or two from Proverbs.  Today’s Proverbs reading hit home:

Proverbs 18:14 - The human spirit can endure a sick body, but who can bear a crushed spirit?

Definitely made me pause and tear up.  It is very true.  My spirit is all I have to keep me going.  I’m doing what I can to keep it up myself, but mainly I lean on God, and all you friends and family massively supporting me makes it 1000x easier.  So thank you!  

Friends and Family: I decided today that my period of mourning the accident is over.  So thank you, but you don’t have to feel sorry for me now.  I need motivation, not pity.  I don’t want my family or friends mourning my suffering.  I want everyone to live life to its fullest and have fun.  Thank you for praying for me, and please keep doing that, but also don’t feel sorry for me.  The mourning is over and now I am just trying to kick ass in here.  While I’m sure well-intentioned, emails that go, “Oh my gosh I heard about your accident and I feel just TERRIBLE!” actually just make me feel terrible.  I don’t want you feeling terrible because of me!  Haha just think about that.  I love you all but I’m gonna be okay.  

Speaking of which, I got in trouble.  A few days ago I asked the doctor if the pain in my fractured rib was anything to worry about, or if I’m pushing myself too hard.  He said it was okay as long as I didn’t bump it into something; that it was a matter of enduring the pain and wouldn’t do additional harm to the bone.  So naturally I pushed harder, lifting weights and grunting through the pain.  Today I think every staff member I worked with told me that they all decided I shouldn’t push my ribs as hard as I was, and that I took the doctor’s advice too literally.  Whoops!  

Lifting (or pushing, rather) some weights.  Also they make me wear those socks.  They keep my legs from getting blood clots.  

PT with this guy was interesting.  Not sure my back was ready for it, but he taught me how to speed around the floor and take sharp turns by putting my hand on the wall.  He even timed me.  Then (see pic), he got me to practice doing wheelies.  It was more fun than it was progress, but anyway…. pretty entertaining.  The best part was watching my mom freak out about it.  

They also put electrodes onto my thighs this morning to stimulate the muscles.  That was interesting and felt pretty funky, too.  It made my legs kick.  I’m supposed to try and help them kick, but so far it’s all mental effort.  

Jake came by for a long while today.  Tax season is over which means Jake’s workload drops by about 90% and he has nothing to do.  We played Mexican Train Domino’s.  I won (again).  Also Joe Riccardi and Ben Isler came by for lunch.  Ben brought some more awesome food from CJK Foods, again.  It’s that all-natural, organic stuff, so probably good for me, I guess.  

Another long day.  I’m pooped.  Thoughts and prayers with those affected by the Boston Marathon tragedy.  G’night.

Chip

RIC day 7

Whew, I’m beat.  Super long day.  Lots of cool things happened, though…

9am - Managed to eat more for breakfast.  Ensure, Honey Nut Cheerios, Milk, OJ. 

10am - PT session with Svetlana.  She put me in this contraption that looks like a chair, at first.  It has a lever on the side that lets me jack myself up like a car with a flat tire, until I’m in a fully standing position.  Since I have a chance of “returning function,” this is used to keep my legs and feet used to supporting my weight.  Also people typically get dizzy or can’t handle the change from all the bed and wheelchair time.  I didn’t experience those issues at all.  I felt the warm blood rushing to my legs, which felt amazing.  It also somehow made my back feel better.  Honestly I can’t wait to do this one again.  I stood for 40 minutes.  Also I transferred to and from this without using the plank, which was another improvement.

While I was standing, a man came in and started talking to me.  Svetlana didn’t seem to have a problem with it, which confused me.  He had incredible credentials and wanted to give me the heads up on stem cell research stages, who to avoid, etc.  The whole time I was thinking, “Who the heck is this guy???” But it turns out I didn’t read the text on my phone from Joe Riccardi saying he’d be visiting me.  His name is Dr. Fessler and he’s world famous for his stem cell studies.  He was the chief neurologist for Northwestern Hospital for some time.  Now he focuses on stem cell research.  After my dad pulled him away to talk more, Svetlana let me know how amazing it was that he visited me at all, and that I should use him as a resource if needed, definitely.  I felt bad for being so skeptical and went and made nice with him.

11am - Group therapy.  We did some stretches and then played volleyball with a balloon.  It was actually really fun.  They put 2 lb weights on my wrists to make it harder on me.  I’m pretty sure me and slim (don’t know the guy’s name in the dreads, yet) dominated that game.  And it was 2 on 3!

Noon - Lunch and a quick surprise visit by Crystal and Kate.  

1pm - Another OT session.  We focused on transferring to the bathroom chair.  Then we spent the rest of the time balancing on a raised platform.  Before I had to hold my hands in front of me.  They let me play Wii this time, which was way more entertaining.  Bowling and swordplay.  I went 1-1 at bowling but dominated at swordplay.  Oh yeah.  That volunteer didn’t know what was coming.

2-3:50pm - Worked.

3:50-4:10pm - Talked with Rebecca who just made it back to Maputo.  Heavy hearts on both ends of the phone.

4:10pm - Late for group psychology session.  I didn’t like it that much.  It mainly consisted of people complaining that doctors weren’t better at predicting problems they had had.  The end result and advice given to the new guy (me) was to speak up and keep the doctor informed of my needs instead of letting issues get worse and worse.  I’m already doing that.  Hopefully next week is better!  They were good people, though.  Lots of kind souls here.

5:30pm - Dinner with parents in cafeteria.  Ate more again - turkey burger, sweet potato fries, two milks, two pickles, some green beans.  I think my appetite is back!  Erik and Nina showed up for some good conversation.

6:30pm - More work.  Shower in chair and bathroom routine.  Fun times!  

Gnight!  

[vimeo 63998990 w=500 h=281]

I had to share this.  It’s hilarious.  These are Rebecca’s friends in Mozambique who I also hung out with quite a bit while I was there.  As you can see they are fun times.  This is actually a sequel to another funny one that I’m trying to figure out how to post here (different coding - Facebook doesn’t seem to want me to share it).  Rebecca complained that there wasn’t a chicken dance so this is their response to that.  

RIC day 6 - April 14, 2013

Today was a good day.  Ice Cube reference intended.  See pics below.  

I slept very well last night, after staying up late and then taking a Valium.  Also the catheter thing has moved from extreme annoyance to mildly annoying routine.  So I woke up at 5am, did it, and passed back out.  I also can now “push” during the catheter, whatever that means.  Makes it easier.  Sorry if that’s disgusting information.

9:30am - Dr. Anschell visited me like he does every morning.  I asked him about the incomplete vs. complete injury.  He said I am listed as incomplete because of all the sensation I am experiencing in my legs.  He further pointed out that every part of your body has individual nerve endings that all line up with those in your spinal cord.  There are no parts of my legs where sensation is absent, so that means ALL nerves are somehow making it through the point of injury and communicating with my brain.  That’s good.  Hey also said that “incomplete” is really a research term and that 3/5 of people experience some return of function in 6-12 months.  ”Some” is a wide-ranging word, meaning that I might have muscle tone in my legs, for instance, but not enough to walk.  6 months is the point when the doctors can really start seeing where I’ll end up.  Seems very far away.

By 10:30am I was dressed and heading to the building chapel for a non-denominational service with my parents.  We ended up making up half of the attendees, but the service was a short 30 minutes but powerful.  The worship leader was a middle eastern woman.  She mentioned the story of Joseph (son of Jacob, not husband of Mary), and how he endured suffering but that it was God’s plan and in the end he became a powerful leader and witness to both Egypt and his family.  It overwhelmed me to think that God might be preparing me for something with this.  I have no idea what, but I have to trust in God.  She also prayed for us by name for strength and healing.  Really moving.

11am - Jake and Eric showed up and were lucky enough to join in for a one hour session they call “Hot Topics” here.  Today’s topic was about bowel movements, medications for them, eating right and hydrating enough, etc.  They found it interesting, I guess.  The more bizarre thing is that it turns out Jake and Dr. Anschell already knew each other from a mutual friend’s parties.  That’s crazy enough but it’s even more nuts considering that Chewie’s wife, Keri, is friends with the assisting doctor to my surgeon from my operation.  What are the chances???

Noon - The Quek Clan (Chewie, Keri, and baby Elise) joined us for lunch in the cafeteria.  I managed to get down an entire Turkey burger, a couple pickles, some fruit and a vanilla soy milk.  It felt good to really eat and seeing the baby was really cool.  She’s so small!  And she doesn’t know anything!  Sponge for information.  Really cool to watch.

1pm - Jake and Eric headed up to the Cubs game.  The rest of us went outside and walked/wheeled around the track behind the Museum of Contemporary Art.  Then Clan Quek said their goodbyes.

2pm - I found out Rebecca was stuck in Jo-burg because her flight was delayed so much she missed her connection.  On top of that they didn’t put her up anywhere and also didn’t get her her bag.  Jo-burg is not a safe place.  After a few texts and phone calls she was lucky enough to stay with a girl she met on the plane for the night and catch a flight tomorrow to Maputo.  Too bad she couldn’t have just stayed in Chicago!!!  May 5…

2:30pm - Cath then workout routine.  A bike makes my legs move which I’m supposed to do every day.  A fellow patient, John, got onto this huge contraption to try and stand and have a forced (mechanically-assisted) walk for the first time.  It was a good workout for him.  Go John!

4pm - Mexican train dominos with the parents.  I won the first two rounds. We are going to keep a tally.

5pm - Bed to rest, then drugs, then nap, then dinner in the cafeteria.  Way better food, again, than the stuff they bring to my room.  I ate the leftover pulled pork eggs benedict from my date with Rebecca yesterday.  The cafeteria will be a good motivator to get my ass out of bed.  I wonder if they did that on purpose.

7pm - Work on PJs stuff.

8pm - Read bible with parents a bit.  Overcome with emotion again reading Acts 22.  Verses 14-16, especially: 

Then he told me, ‘The God of our ancestors has chosen you to know his will and to see the Righteous One and hear him speak.  For you are to be his witness, telling everyone what you have seen and heard.  What are you waiting for? Get up and be baptized. Have your sins washed away by calling on the name of the Lord.’

8:30pm - My brother Marc called to check on me and wish me well.  He is the writer of the family so he was nice enough to say he liked my writing.  He also was celebrating Nick’s birthday, who is an old friend of mine from a decade ago working at Red Lobster in Lexington, KY.  So that was cool to catch up with him.    

Sorry for the novel.  It was a good day.  Writing this out helps me remember and appreciate it.  

G’night!

[gallery]

Day 6 photos - Sunday, April 14, 2013.  Jake, Eric, me and my dad talking to Dr. Anschell.  Chewie and baby Elise and me.  Me pumping iron.

Rehab - day 5

I went outside today! It was great except for the cold and the lesson of learning that Chicago sidewalks are slanted towards the street.  The thought of my wheelchair (and therefore me) heading into oncoming traffic after what I’ve already been through wasn’t exactly calming.  But the place Rebecca and I checked out was pretty awesome.  I forgot my wallet so she paid.  Embarrassing. 

Today my OT informed me that my file has me listed as an “incomplete injury”.  This means that for whatever reason they believe that my brain signals TO my legs (not from… which I’m already getting to a degree and is less relevant) are making it past the point of injury.  This doesn’t promise anything and I need to learn why they think that, but it’s good news.  Incomplete injuries have a much higher rate of returning function.  Time will tell, of course.  But it’s a reason to hope - something to grab on to for now.  So I’ll take it.

The clinical psychologist told me that the majority of returning function is realized within the first 6 months.  Rarely in the first month.  Then there is a chunk that see return by month 18.  Then a small percentage see return all the way at year 2 or 3… or more.  So that’s helpful to know.

Today I lifted weights which felt great.  I also did a group exercise where we made arm movements with and without weights to some funky music.  It was a very diverse group in age and ethnicity, which was pretty cool. We shall see but I think I made some friends and it was pretty fun. 

Rebecca leaving for Mozambique today was and is by far the hardest thing to cope with.  So I’m not gonna talk about that.  She comes back May 5 which seems like a million years here.  

Nina and Erik stopped by for a bit which was nice.  They biked here on lake shore trail so I was naturally jealous but was happy to see that Erik wore a helmet for probably the first time outside of a competitive event (where it’s required).  

Okay that’s it.  Gonna have another one of the brownies that Rebecca left me.  She always, always, gives me sweets whenever we separate.  I’m not sure of her strategy there but I guess it’s working :) 

Rehab - day 4

Hello,

It was brought to my attention that more than 3 people read this.  So I’ll post another update!  It helps me remember what “progress” is here, so it’s a healthy exercise.  

They had a wheelchair made for me that is way smaller than the others I’ve seen.  When I asked, they said it’s because it’s ideal for me since I am decent at transferring in and out of the chair already since I came in with reasonable upper body strength.  It’s also really fast!  So while I’m still feeling a little sick, it feels good to glide around in it.  I gambled and worked with my parents on transfers (moving from wheelchair to a mat or the bed), too, which were successful.  So good progress there.  They are already talking about me being able to get in the chair without a plank, which would be nice.  I’m a little unsure how I’d do that alone right now.  We shall see.  

Another cool exercise I did yesterday - which was passing a ball around my back to my other hand.  Extremely tricky as sitting up without leg muscles is way harder than it sounds.  But I had fun with it and the OT seemed to be really entertained by my insistence at getting several in a row without falling.

I was able to eat more today, too, which was nice.  I’ve also learned to have a protein shake if I’m not able to down the food they give me.  

Also, I’m weaning myself off the pain killers.  Before I was taking them every 4 hours.  Tonight I just asked for a Tylenol.  I’m hoping this will increase my appetite and leave me less groggy in general.  I experimented this morning before PT by taking Valium instead of the painkiller, which only led to me falling asleep for a couple hours.  Not very productive.

I have to say that I’m absolutely overwhelmed, to the point of tears, by the amount of love and support I have been receiving through this ordeal.  I feel extremely blessed to be part of a such a strong network of people.  

Rebecca and my parents have been incredible.  Tonight was Rebecca’s last night before flying back to Mozambique for a few weeks so she curled up next to me in bed and we watched a show of Castle on Huluplus on my laptop.  She wanted to watch some show called “Girls” but I don’t have HBO login stuff yet.  Sorry if that’s sappy to say but it was by far the best part of my day.  

We got a day pass for me to go outside tomorrow for a bit to check out a new coffee shop.  Considering the only time I’ve been outside since the accident on Easter was for transfers in and out of ambulances, I’m really looking forward to it.  I don’t care if it sleets but sunny warmth would be nice (in case you’re reading this, God).  

Thanks again, everyone.  Thanks for the cards, emails, texts, prayers, everything.  I love it and it really helps.  Having moments of sadness or frustration is inevitable here so I  need all the help I can get.  

Good night!

PS - No more iTunes gift cards, please.  Seriously I have like $325 worth now or something ridiculous.  Enough for lots and lots of books, games, movies, and music!  Thank you but no more!

PPS - On a related topic, whoever sent me the anonymous $100 iTunes card, let me know so I can say thanks!

Rehab - day 2

Hi All,

I figured this might be easier than forwarding around an email like I did last time.  But anyway I have a few updates I’d like to share with those that care.  Some of this you can skip if you want but the real reason for this blog is a conversation with a Tech here spawned from the fact that a patient that’s been here for 3 months just started walking about 20 minutes ago.  His was a gang-related gunshot wound.  If you want to skip to what I learned from that conversation, go to the paragraph that starts… the real reason.

Today was my first full day in rehab.  I was transferred yesterday in an ambulance.  Rebecca rode along which was nice.  As soon as I arrived I realized this place lives up to its reputation as the top rehab joint in the country.  Everyone is extremely knowledgeable, including the nurse staff, the PT (physical therapy) equipment is the latest and greatest, etc.  It’s great.  

My morning starting with OT (occupational therapy) testing how I could do at putting clothes on.  I probably got a B+ for the shirt and a D for the shorts.  But she seemed pleased.  Then another test to wash myself, followed by some questions.   Eval stage.  The much more interesting eval was the PT, which followed.  I got into my brace, sat up in bed, and kind of shimmied across this plank into a wheelchair.  I was so excited I just went ahead and did a few slow laps around the place, stopping by the fridge to pick up one of my smoothies.  It was all very painful but I didn’t really care.  Found a magazine on my tour about wheelchair tennis, rugby, basketball… there are TONS of very competitive events out there.  Crazy and cool.  

The afternoon OT session was much more interesting.  Back to the wheelchair and into the gym to balance sitting still (way harder than it sounds) and hit a balloon back and forth with the therapist.  It was extremely easy so she gave me a ball I had to catch with two hands.  Much harder to do without falling over.  Then she gave me what looked like wooden versions of the Perfect Pushup and I did 2x10 dips.  It was nice to make such great progress but also frustrating that I can’t just jump on the ground and do some pushups like I used to do.  Oh well.  Day by day.

The real reason I’m writing is because of this Tech Assistant, Zebe (pronounced zee-bee) who has been gabbing it up with me all night.  I now am an expert on catheters, the functionality of the bladder, the functionality of the large intestine, rectum and sphincter, and most importantly, know some more about when to look for signs of change.  When that other patient started walking, the nurses got excited and generally everyone was in a good mood.  I asked how long he’d been here - 3 months.  This led to the following info he shared, much of which the doctors won’t for liability reasons.  FYI Zebe has been doing this for well over a decade and knows his stuff.  He’s smart, older, and doesn’t care about liability stuff.

• The fact that I have sensation in my legs is a very good sign


• After surgery, the spinal cord is clenched from the swelling/healing area.  This takes 2-3 weeks, or more, to dissipate.  This is the pain in my back right now, mostly.


• The spinal cord is a bundle of nerves, right? After the swelling fades, one by one each of those individual strands of nerves starts firing again.  Or not.  There is literally zero way of knowing which ones will or won’t.  The more that do, the better chance of gaining functionality.  But this part of the process takes another 1-4 months, or longer.  


• The lower in the spine the injury, the better chance of walking again.  Mine is at T12.  He said that’s like borderline for tons of different things and nerves in the body.  I will likely research more.  The guy that walked today was T6.  

He explained that doctors in the past were burned by saying a patient would or wouldn’t walk again.  Often times ones told they would couldn’t, and those told they couldn’t, could.  There is NO way to know what will happen, or even reasonably predict.  Everyone here says that’s the worst part about spinal injury is the inability to compare to other injuries.  No two are the same and therefore my case is unique, just like everyone else’s.  I can hope, though.  

Tomorrow is another day.

Much love,

Chip

Chip (still) in the hospital...

Everyone- below is a note that Chip sent to some friends/family yesterday. After chatting with him, he asked me to post it to the blog. Enjoy.

Update after drafting the below: This is simply my point of view.  It’s not meant to offend or judge anyone.  On the contrary it’s meant to uplift and provide encouragement and hope.  It started off as me being moved to write an email and turned into almost a manifesto or something like that.  I also wrote this late last night as it was weighing on my heart.  If you find it uplifting but have questions, please, let’s talk about it.  I love this stuff.  I already previewed with Rebecca and my parents and a few questions already came up.  I just didn’t want to write any more of a novel than I already did or I would have gone into more detail.  Enjoy! (I hope)

Dear Friends/Family/Loved Ones/Anyone else somehow affected by me being in my current condition,

I have been hearing quite a lot this week about people asking each other, “How’s Chip feeling?” or “What’s gonna happen with ____?” or “How is he coping with ____???” or various other questions that are hard to answer.  This email is my small attempt to answer those questions and also provide some deeper insight into my way of thinking, in general.  If you find this worthwhile, great.  If not, then hopefully no harm done!  

First of all, thank you, thank you, from the bottom of my heart, to all of you.  You have each touched me in some way, whether it be sending flowers, cards, emails, texts (they found my phone today - slightly more cracked than it already was), hugs, visits, etc.  You are all awesome and one huge benefit of this is seeing how people are coming together.  I sense that we should somehow harness this energy being created and use it somehow, but that’s for later.  

Today I realized that each of you is going through your own style of coping with this.  I’m not sure why it didn’t really hit me as hard earlier in the week.  But in truth, we need each other.  For many of you, you need help with aspects of this the same way I need your love and support.  In many ways yours might be more complicated, since my pains are visible to everyone.  Please just think about how that might pertain to you and know I’m here for you.  I’ll be more accessible once I’m in rehab. 

How’s Chip feeling?  Well, every day is different.  After surgery I was ready to eat actual food, do work, and basically hit the ground running.  It was strange and shocking people and it faded the next day quite a bit.  Since then I’ve basically been managing pain and stuff that happens when you’re in surgery for 5 hours and trying to grasp how these changes might affect my life.  Today I was able to eat what they call “full liquid” meals, which is basically cream of whatever soups and pudding.  That was a huge step.  But this is all physiological.  In the scheme of things it’s not that important and it will all get better to some end that I can’t predict at this point.

I may end up in a wheelchair for life.  I may all of a sudden be able to walk again.  I may have a long, tedious, physical therapy that lasts for years and results in me being in either a wheelchair or walking or running an ultramarathon.  I really have no idea and I’ve decided that while it does affect how I go about doing things, it won’t affect how I live my life.  Let me explain.

People keep talking to me about “choices that need to be made” and how “this changes everything.” Or they’ll tell me some story of someone that was in a worse situation and is now an olympic skiier or something.  These are all good things in their own regard, but for me the drivers and motivators are much deeper than that.  

In my mind, there is only one choice: Will this really change how I want to live my life?  No, it won’t.  I still want to do a million things.  I still want to travel.  I still want to create a workplace that is truly unique and makes people proud to be there, while also providing a need to the community.  I still want to compete in athletic events - I just might be in a wheelchair, not sure.  Etc. Etc. Etc.  I still want all that.

I refuse to let this change who I am at my core.  Two main reasons why:

• I’m just not built that way.  Call it the way I was raised, my DNA, whatever.  It’s just not my style to roll over and die.  


• I derive my strength from the belief that God wants me to do things for Him.  I strongly believe that this happened for a reason.  I decided quite a while ago that God could use me how He saw fit to do His will.  Over the years this belief has deepened.  

For those interested, let me dive into the God stuff. 

We are all born with a certain set of DNA that we had no involvement in creating.  At best our parents had a very small role in it, but don’t forget they didn’t choose theirs, either.  You can argue that science will be able to determine those things for us at some point, but based on what?  It’s still using the core ingredients that God gave us.  So there’s that.  The “nature” side of things, as people like to say.

Then there’s how we were raised.  Not just that, but literally every single experience you had in your life, ever.  This is the part that really matters as much as your DNA.  How your parents raised you might account for a large chunk of this.  Then there’s the rest of your family, your friends, your schooling, etc.  That’s just the tip of the iceberg.  Every single “impression” you have had in your life has somehow influenced you, whether you like it or not.  There are 1000 a day if you pay attention.  More than that.  Fact. This is the “nurture” side of things.  The big thing to realize here is just how much YOU influence others.  Everything you say or do somehow impacts someone else.  It’s up to us if that impact is positive or negative. I try to get the PJs managers thinking this way so it trickles down to employees, but it’s not always easy.  

So what do these two huge deductions lead us to understand?  In my opinion, it is that we are in control of very, very little.  Each time we feel a loss of control or loss of power, it is comparatively ridiculous considering how little we had to begin with.  Even if you choose your schooling, your profession, your significant other, what you eat for a given meal, your friends, etc, the amount of things out of your control are so incredibly overwhelming that the idea of “being in control” is ludicrous.  I have always kind of thought this but it’s crystal clear given my current state.  I realize you might say this clashes with what I just said about impacting each person, but it doesn’t.  Those things matter very much, even if they are very little pieces of our lives. I’d be happy to talk more about it with you if you want.

Not much God stuff, you say?  I disagree.  I believe God loves each of us dearly and realizes more than anyone how little control we really have, because if we aren’t in control, then who is?  He is!  God is in control!  But he loves us so much that he cedes the control right back to us.  In my personal opinion, we have free will and our relationship with God is the strongest partnership possible.  He wanted us to love Him on our own accord, so he was forced to give us free will.  He knew we’d muck it up plenty.  But does a parent always hold the child’s hand, or do they let them walk on their own?  They do it out of love so they can grow.  

So if God has all the power but wants to give us the control, how does that make any sense?  What good is it to have billions of people with the same amount of control?  Do we carve out more and more for ourselves?  A lot of people do this.  But if you ask them, they couldn’t have done it without luck.  Luck.  I do believe in luck, too.  I don’t think God has his hand in whether or not I win a round of golf, necessarily.  There are things that don’t really matter to Him.  All of which is man-made, I’ll add.  These people went from maybe controlling .000000001% of the world to controlling .0000001%.  There are obviously a handful of huge power players out there, but even they can’t change the world without enlisting everyone else.  I think about my business and its growth and in frustration with landlords, I contemplate how much it would cost to buy up one city block in Chicago.  Just one block.  A tiny speck on the planet.  It would take me a lifetime to be able to accomplish that, if not longer.

There’s only one logical move when billions of people are born with equal ability to influence each other if there is to be any hope of large achievement (in my mind) in life, and that is to concede the control back to God.  I consider my relationship with God a partnership.  He’s the one with all the power and He gives me access to that power if I’m shooting for things he wants.  This allows me access to His power so I can REALLY get some stuff done, along with the confidence to do it!  In return he gets both my love, which he wants badly, and also moves towards His goals.  If I am working FOR God instead of for myself or for humanity or anything else “earthly”, the possibilities multiply exponentially.  If I say, “God, I’m going to do this, but only if it helps you achieve your goals,” then all of a sudden the guy backing me is the guy with all the power!  I choose to be a vessel for God’s work rather than try and formulate my own idealisms and shoot for those.  Without God we are spinning our wheels and moving nowhere.  

Conclusion: 

Because of that, I am still very confident in my current situation.  Does it hurt? Yes.  Does it pretty much suck and make me spend time changing plans and whatnot? Yes, of course.  But they are going to have to crush both my brain and my heart for me to stop.  As long as both my brain and my heart are functioning well, I believe I can help God achieve His goals.  Still having both heart and head in full function tells me God’s not done with me, yet.  Legs are a luxury.  I’ll be just fine.  I obviously hope I can use them again but I’m also glad I didn’t totally waste them while I had them.  

Okay so recap:

1. We aren’t in control


2. God is, but gives it right back to us


3. If we, in turn, partner with God, we can achieve anything

Please don’t consider this a sermon.  I am letting you know where my strength comes from.  Take it as you will.  I love you all.  And again, if you have questions or even if you totally disagree, let’s talk about it.  I love this stuff, even arguing about it.

Thanks again for all the support and see you soon!